How To Beat Your Chevrusa
We’ve all been there…sitting in the beis, apartment, or shul, book open, pens twirling, minds racing, tensions are high and the argument is about to erupt. “The Rashba DOES NOT SAY THAT!” You shout. “OF COURSE HE DOES!” Retorts your equally quick witted opponent. And then from there the ‘leshem shamayim’ argument spirals out of control. Both of you are surely right and at the same time both surely wrong. I am not one to advocate conflict resolution tactics in a case like this, truly there should be a winner. But what I will offer (courtesy of Stepcase Lifehack) is suggestions on how to WIN. Because let’s be honest, that’s what matters. (By the way you’re both wrong, the Rashba doesn’t say what either of you think, you mistranslated a word one page back, four lines from the bottom. It changes everything.)
In the DO department Sloane suggests a few things that may seem like old news to many of us (who have been arguing since the womb) but a refresher course, as the Mesilat Yesharim tells us, is always in order. He reminds us to stay calm, “If you lose your temper,” he says, “you lose.” Ask Questions, something we all know about, Know Your Opponent, and Try for a Win-Win. All great pieces of advice when dealing with conflict in general.
In the DON’Ts he gives us great points to remember such as Don’t get personal.
And of course my favorite section: The Sneaky Way. Sloane makes some not so sneaky suggestions, that any Yeshiva Bachur should already have in his repertoire, namely Exaggerate your opponent’s point and Contradict Confidently. Exaggeration is a key point in the chevrusa battle, taking a theory to it’s logical extreme and testing it’s stability is one of the best ways to prove a point. And of course nothing is more important than being confident, ‘if you are not for yourself, then who will be for you?’
Here is a quote:
There is not much point in having brilliant ideas if we cannot persuade people of their value. Persuasive debaters can win arguments using the force of their reason and by the skillful deployment of many handy techniques. Here are some general dos and don’ts to help you win arguments together with some sneaky tactics to be aware of.
Check out the full article here and brush up on your chevrusa battle tactics.
dude, that’s why you need to carry a can of whipped cream and a pie tin in your backpack at ALL TIMES.
Comedy and more importantly, victory ensues.
-Seamus